this is my public journal - who I am, what I do, where I go and what happens on a daily basis. Names have been changed to protect theinnocent and guilty!
Monday 6th December 2004

December starts with an incredible amount of concerts, dances, work and of course the Christmas Tournament traditionally held in a soggy field somewhere in Europe! Already over this weekend saw 2 concerts with local bands.

This morning starts with the customary "Morning Stables". A Daily tradition all over the world where Humans and Equines test each other to see who's awake first. At this time of the year swear words hit the morning air long before dawn yawns its way over the horison and hot coffee wedges open eyelids.

A ton and a half of horse at point blank range opens the eyes before any caffine has hit the system as the customary "morning struggle" starts at "something past five!"

Yes folks welcome to inmate number one - Warhorse Maestro. My long standing equine partner with a sense of humour, hatred of vetinary surgeons, love of real ale and extreme ability of causing mayhem, confusion and pain at less than a seconds notice. I suppose you could say he's an Equine Delinquent. We've been together since he was a yearling and now at 20 years old this aged Equine delinquent is still as frisky as the day he dragged me into a fence, iron bath and put the vet in hospital before careering off wildly down the field with a syringe still sticking out of his neck.

Maestro is Half Hanovarian and half Irish hunter, as black as midnight with a little bay round his nostrils. 18.1hh (6'1") to his shoulder and hooves the size of dinner plates. Like me he has a love of life and for an OAP horse still charges round any field like a racehorse. Silke (my Yard Manager) referrs to him as "Sefton on Drugs" while most of the other girls call him "Boris".

What is a Warhorse I hear you all ask! Well. A Warhorse is what a Medieval Knight rode into battle. This horse was trained to defend it's rider, create a gap in the opponents battle line and cause as much chaos and confusion as possible - the equivalent to todays Tank on a battlefield. Maestro is much bigger than the original Warhorses but just as well trained and so has a certain reputation at tournaments. Often refered to as "The Black Beast" many opposing knights have come out of combat and melees with teethmark or a hoof print somewhere on their armour and some even surrendered at the sight of him coming into the arena in full horse armour and colours. Some have said that they saw him give an evil smile as he sets of in a gallop towards them.

but that's enough about him.. well nearly. He took me buy surprise this morning and managed to catch me with his quarters and proceed to squeeze me against the wall. My eyes had reached extreme bulging point before I managed to get a good punch in his ribs and he moved away with an innocent expression of "sorry, didn't see you there". I wheezed a lot and swore eventually before resuming normal duties.

Morning excersise is always a test as the string is going out on road excersise the local schoolkids are just going in. the place is pandemonium on the main road. there's cars SUV's bus', parents and kids milling in all directions along with the rush hour traffic too. Every horse is turned out to its best with dark blue excersise rugs over their quarters with a silver stags head embroidered on opposite corners, all the riders wearing hi visibility jackets. This morning 10 horses riding 2 abreast create their own space on the road as we trot past. Parents treat us with respect and caution as two riders has "CAUTION: HORSES KICK and BITE on their hi visibility clothing - one at the front of the ride and one at the back. The kids love the sight of these massive horses that make the ground tremble as they come past with majestic fluid grace. Some wave and we wave back.

This morning also sees me at the Doctors. After the customary prod, poke and Blood Pressure test he declares me alive and kicking, changes the blood pressure tablets and tells me to see him Friday.

Monday Afternoon sees Lucy and Donna's training session. They've decided to move out of the grooms and squires tournaments and into the novice tournament section. This has cause much gossip and unrest within the tournament community as well as some open hostility from some. There's nothing in the rules that prevents them from competing at any level and I'm more than happy to provide them with the training, armour, weapons and horses. The more the merrier.. besides the stables income will go up! Most of the guys have been very supportive and I believe there has been a considerable amount of private betting going on.

One french chappie who shall remain nameless phoned personally to express his disgust and his opinion of "females in a male environment". Unfortunatly for him Lucy was listening to the speakerphone conversation and informed him that as he was in the novices section she would personally rip his head off and s**t down his neck. this left a stunned silence atthe other end of the phone and me with a very nasty vision in my mind.

Donna won't be calling me "Tubby" again after this afternoon's training session where she failed to out run me while wearing both chain and plate armour and I brought he down with a nasty and callous melee move worthy of an England Rugby prop forward and then flattened Lucy with what is technically known as "The English Coat Hanger" as she came in to help Donna. Both girls have quickly mastered the art of getting up off the floor in full armour as they spend the first week being knocked down by both human and horse. nobody said that it would be easy!

Foot combat is a requirement besides equestrian battle skills and the girls are doing well with this. they have the basic moves and just require the experience of putting them into practice, this is why every afternoon is put aside for weapons and foot combat skills and the late morning for the equestrian tournament skills. I'm also showing them some of the more "advanced" skills that will help them in a tight corner.

Evening stables is about to start and the mood on the yard is good to high. Everyone is excited about Lucy and Donna's first appearence in the Novice section for the christmas tournament and they all sit about in the tackroom cleaning the saddles, bridles and other leatherwork used. They chat merrily away with large mugs of coffee, tea and a huge rapidly dissapearing pile of biscuits. once that's done they'll set fair the yard, hang the night hay nets up, last feed and sweep round and then they all go to the local for a pint before settling down for the vening in the stables flats.

I'm lucky to have such a great bunch of girls working here.

As for me..... tonight is a rare night for December with nothing on the calendar so I can sit in and watch a movie and have a beer... maybe Big L might come round and see me - more about her another day though.

Comments
on Dec 07, 2004
Hell of a blog! Allow me to say that you are far more than twice the blogger our last English gentleman was!
on Dec 07, 2004
Thanks greywar. the daily diary will continue!